Build a Mindful Connection With Your Pet | 与你的宠物构建正念连接

Writing an article about mindfulness and pets was not an easy task. Many people don’t see much of the connection with them. In this article, we try to briefly address how and why we need to change our view of life in the perspective of our furry friends.

要写一篇关于“正念”和“宠物”的文章并非易事。多数人很难没有看到他们之间的联系。在这篇文章中,我们将试着简要讨论为什么以及如何从从宠物的角度改变我们的人生观。

First, close your eyes and think about a typical day in your life. From the moment waking up, we begin our day lost in our thoughts - deciding what to dress, where to eat, next appointment, deadlines for jobs…. hundreds of thoughts and situations. When we return home exhausted, who is there waiting for you? - Your lovely furry baby. But what it’s the involvement of mindfulness in our life?

The Harvard Medical school defines mindfulness as 'the ability to live each moment as it unfolds and accept it without judgment — can help reduce stress and enhance health'.Unfortunately, we are doing the opposite. Our mind is always wandering in the past, feeling guilty of what we did wrong or what we could change, or thinking too much about the future like pretending to have psychic abilities that we actually don’t have. Future is just a consequence of our present!. Instead of being mindful, we are doing our best to be judgmental of others, ourselves or any situation that happens in our daily life.

首先,闭上眼睛,想想你生命中最寻常的一天。从醒来那一刻起,我们就开始了迷失在无穷尽并不断涌现的想法中 - 决定如何穿衣、在哪吃饭、会议日程、某项工作的截止时间(…)。当我们晚上回到家时已经被工作折磨的疲惫不堪,然而可爱的毛茸茸宝贝依然满怀期待迎接你的归来。所以在我们的日常生活中,正念究竟有何作用?

哈佛医学院将正念定义为“能够对生命中的每一刻不额外加以判断地接受的能力- 正念可以帮助减轻压力和巩固健康”。但事实却与我们多数人的生活恰恰相反。我们的脑海总是徘徊在过去,对我们曾今犯下的过错或我们可以本可以改变的事情感到内疚,或者对未来想得太多,好似我们拥有预测未来的能力但其实我们并没有。未来只是我们现在的结果。日常生活中,多数人只会尽全力评价着别人,自身以及发生的事情。

In our experience with cats and dogs working in Ohmycat for the past 4 years and of course with our 3 cats, We have discovered a lot of the similarities between cats or dogs and their human parents.

A recent report published in the journal Applied Animal Behavior Science pointing out the similarity between the personalities of parents and their dogs using the most commonly accepted personality dimensions.

From that study they concluded that there are personality traits which human parents and their pets are involved:

在过去4年OHMYCAT的工作经验以及和家中3只猫的经验中,我们发现了猫或狗及其饲养者之间的许多相似之处。最近发表在《动物行为科学》杂志上的一份报告指出,依照最普遍接受的人格维度标准,饲养者和其狗的个性有高度相似性。根据这项研究,他们得出的结论是:

“The dog parents rated their dogs as having similar personalities to themselves in all five of the personality traits measured. The strongest association was between the parent's degree of neuroticism (when a person is sensitive and nervous vs. secure and confident). It is often referred to as a measure of "emotional stability"), and that of their dog, followed by extraversion ” (this looks at whether the individual is outgoing, sociable and energetic vs. solitary and reserved).

This study revealed how much influence we give to our pet. By extension, using our experience of many years of understanding of pet’s behavior we can assume that the results of these studies can be applied very much to cats and their parents emotional-energy bonds.

We can conclude that there is a strong connection in the emotional energy field, and if we see our cat or dogs are always in fears, hiding all the time or having a hard time interacting with new people or other dogs, there could be a projection of how we are, without realizing it. If we come home angry or feeling annoyed, we will definitely imprint that emotion-energy on our pets. On the contrary, if we are calm and levelheaded that good energy will be spread throughout your home.

报告指出:“在测试的五项人格特质中,狗的饲养者都认为他们的狗具有与自己相似的性格。”最强烈的关联是饲养者的神经质程度(当一个人是敏感的、紧张的、安全的和自信的)。这通常被称为“情绪稳定”的一种衡量标准)。其次是外向的(一个人是否外向、善于交际、精力充沛,还是孤独又保守)。

这项研究揭示了我们对宠物的影响有多大。根据我们多年对宠物行为的经验,我们可以假设这些研究的结果可以同样应用于猫及其饲养者的情感-能量纽带。

我们可以得出情感能量场中存在着强烈的联系,如果我们的猫或狗总是处于恐惧之中,或总有躲藏行为,或很难与陌生人或其他同类互动,那很有可能作为我们的投射,我们就是这样的人。如果我们回家时很生气,我们必然会把这种情绪-能量投射在我们的宠物身上。相反,如果我们冷静又温和,这样的能量也会散播到家中的每个角落。

Observing is a good starting point to get connected with your pet, as well as for you to start mindfulness practice and lower your stress level and anxiety.

When you get to the stage of calming your mind and just being present without judgment you will be able to see magic things: Reality with no filters or color lens, just the river of life.

Your connection with your pet on the other level is emotional - energy connection. I will call the “mirror effect”.

观察是与宠物建立连结的好起点,同样也是你开始正念练习,减少压力和焦虑的好机会。当你的头脑进入平静的阶段,不妄加判断,只待在当下这一刻,你将会感受到:一个没有被滤镜扭曲过的现实展现在你的面前。你和宠物在另一个层次上的联系是情感-能量的联系。我称之为“镜像效应”。

Have you heard about a cat leaving his/her parent because the parent is jobless or living in a poor neighborhood? Guess who is always being present without any judgment? Yes, them! From here we have a great opportunity to learn from cats and dogs - live in now without any judgment leads us to less suffering and to be a happier person.

你有听说过一只猫因为主人突然失业或住在贫穷的社区而理解出走吗?在这种情况下,猜猜谁能够做到不妄加判断并且活在当下?就是我们的毛绒绒朋友们。这是个向猫和狗学习的绝好机会-活在当下,不妄加评论引领我们减少痛苦,成为一个更快乐的人。

We don’t realize that we are in the present because our mind creates fiction to see what it wants to see. And it has a lot of space to develop their inner dialogue and mental pictures from the extremes of the timeline (past/future) which the present has not held any space for it. We do not realize this situation because our mind is always in DISTRACTION ( thinking, chatting, social media, online shopping etc). No means you cannot do any of these, you simply aren’t aware of your own distraction.

我们没有意识到正当下是因为头脑虚构了它想要看到的东西,并且有足够多的空间来从当前没有为其保存任何空间的时间线(过去/将来)来开展内部对话和情绪图片。我们没有意识到这种情况,因为头脑总是分散注意力(思考、聊天、社交媒体、网上购物等)。并不是说你不能做这些,你只是没有意识到自己的注意力已经被分散。

Observe your cat when he/she is eating, playing or sleeping, and you may find they are absolutely focused on what’s going. They are totally mindful when they decide to play with a dirty delivery box rather than your pricey cat toy.

试着观察你的猫,当他/她在吃饭、玩或睡觉时,往往是如此全神贯注。当他们决定玩一个肮脏的快递盒而不是你特意买的昂贵猫玩具时,这是他们有意识下的选择。

Distraction is one of the ‘problems’ as we cannot see how emotional or how lost in our mind we can be. And being mindful doesn’t necessarily mean to quit your conventional life or simply became an emotionless robot. Just stay where you are and be present to identify the quality of your emotions and from there “make conscious choice” of your next step. Our furry friends can be a perfect guide to help us to improve positive emotion in our life.

我们之前提到,我们的注意力分散是“问题”之一,因为我们无法看到我们的过度情绪化或思维的迷失。这并不一定意味着你需要放弃日常生活,或者简单地成为毫无情绪反应的机器人。相反,现在只需停留在您所在的地方,安静识别一下当下的情绪质量并未下一步作出“有意识地选择”。为了享受更真实的快乐,我们的毛茸茸朋友们其实可以成为我们生活中发挥积极情感指导的引路人。

1. Live the now, be present since wake up |

从醒来那一刻开始活在当下

When you wake up in the morning, please don’t hurry to grab your phone. Look at your cat eyes but stay in bed if you want, and be grateful to the universe and yourself that you are still alive, as others may not able to make it. Slowly get your routine life started and prepare for your day. When you get off your pillow in the morning, you’ve already got everything you need in life. Remember to pet your furry friends and express your love gently and try to live in that moment.

早上醒来时,请不要急于拿起你的手机。躺在床上,感谢所有的一切。缓慢地苏醒意识开始你的日常生活,为一天做准备。记得当你早上醒来时,其实你已得到了生活中想要的一切。记得抚摸你毛茸茸的朋友,温柔地表达你的爱,活在那一刻。

2. Breath | 呼吸

Observe your pets that are always in present. Try to identify their needs when they bark or meow. Watch and feel their stable breathing, and try to breathe with them

观察你的宠物。当他们吠叫或喵叫的时候,试着找出他们的需求。观察和感受他们稳定的呼吸,试着和他们一起呼吸。

3. Observe | 观察

If you need to feed your pet, pls be conscious of what you are doing. Don’t do it mechanically as a routine job. Observe yourself when you are preparing the food and feel the love between them and you.

如果你需要给宠物喂食,请有意识的准备食物,而不要机械性的把它当作一项常规工作来做。在准备食物的时候观察自己,感受他们和你之间的爱。

4. Stop old behavior, focus and take on your role as a pet parent | 改变过去的行为,集中精力,扮演好宠物父母的角色

Try to have regular playtime with your cat or dog. However, if your someone else or pet sitter do the work for you, spare some time from your busy schedule to do it as well even just a short time. Leave behind all the devices that may cause distractions (mobile, magazines, iPad, etc. ) When you are playing with your pet, observe them, watch their movements and their reaction from any of your interaction. Look into their eyes and you will feel their strong sense of present joy. At the same time observe your self, catch the present moment as it is.

试着与你的猫或狗有一个固定的玩耍时间。如果你又其他人或宠物保姆为你做这项工作,也务必从繁忙的日程中抽出一些时间来与他们玩耍和交流,即使只是很短的时间。留下所有可能引起分心的设备(手机、杂志、iPad等)。)当你和你的宠物玩耍时,观察它们的动作和它们在任何互动情况下的反应,看着它们的眼睛,你就会看到他们当下强烈喜悦感。同时观察你自己,抓住现在的时刻。

5. Break the circle, Leave the problems out | 打破习惯,抛开问题

When you are going through your home, right after you cross the threshold door after a long day work, try to visualize that you are leaving all your problems or situations of the day outside of the door. And when you are home, look into his/her eyes and feel the love between you without any complaints. Feel one more time the moment and how present you begin to be.

在一天长时间的工作结束后进入家门,试着想象你正在把一天中的所有问题都抛在门外。当你走进家时,看着他/她的眼睛,感受到你们之间的爱,不要有任何抱怨。再次感受那一时刻。

6. Be weird, be human, be connected | 做任何你想做的事情

Talk to your pet, it is not weird. Remember, don’t judge yourself, they will listen to yourself with no judgment. If it's hard for you to leave your bad day out of the home, try to pet your baby and breath with them for a while then you will feel better.

和你的宠物说话,这并不奇怪。记住,不要判断自己,他们会在你没有作妄加判断的情况下倾听你的爱。如果你依然很难做到,试着同你的毛茸茸朋友一起呼吸一会儿,很快你会感觉好很多。

7. Be furry | 成为他们

Try to understand that if you have a high level of stress, it is mainly caused by something that you are doing and that is leading you to feel the stress. Don’t blame others for your stress because negative feelings are originated from you and it is affecting you. To get that understanding requires you to work on seeing reality from a different perspective. Different circumstances in your life are actually helping you to see it. Read this advice without judgment but the willingness to give a try and change some of the repetitive distractions that most of us are immersed. From there start to build your self-healing - Be your pet for a while.

如果你压力巨大,试着理解它是由你所做的事情所造成的,是这个让你感受到压力。不要因你的压力而责备别人,因为消极的感情源于你,它也正影响着你。要得到这种理解,你需要在不同的角度看待现实生活。你生活中遭遇的不同处境实际上是帮助你看到的。在不妄加评论的情况下阅读这个建议,但愿意尝试和改变我们大部分沉浸在其中的一些重复的干扰。从那里开始你的自我修复-你也成为他们。

As a conclusion, I must say that life is a gift, and being alive and truly happy is a miracle that only we can construct. Our pets are amazing spirits that come to guide us and raise our vibration. To get a true connection we must take the first step to be involved in reality: stronger attention, stop fighting with reality and accept it. See your dogs and cats: they are just PRESENT and happy because they never judge. To some extent, they are our little masters Yoda.

作为一个结论,我必须说生命是一件礼物,活着和获得真正的快乐是一个只有我们才可以构建的奇迹。我们的宠物是引领我们的天使。要取得真正的连结,我们必须迈出第一步,参与现实:更强有力的专注力,停止与现实的抗争,接受现实。再次观察下你的狗和猫:他们不轻易妄加判断,活在当下并且十分快乐。从某些层面而言,他们才是我们的小主人。